2003-04-11 - 4:41 p.m.

Monopoly

Do you know how many times you've played this game in your lifetime? I don't know how many times I've played the game.

But I do know that on a certain level I hate the game. It encourages a type of socialism that ironically is the exact opposite point of the game (which is supposed to be about capitalism). The problem I have with Monopoly isn't that I've got a bug about socialism. I don't. In fact, I really am a socialist both at heart and by voting record.

The problem is Monopoly encourages dumb socialism. Let me explain.

Have you ever read the rules to the game? Seriously, have you?

I've found that most people learn to play the game when they are in grade school. They are usually taught the game by a parent, grandparent, or sibling. They usually can't read at the time, and as they get older and play more and more, instead of reading the rules from front to back, they only consult them to look up how much money players start with.

There is no $500 reward for landing on "Free Parking". It says so in the rules. There is no $50 reward for sucking it up and rolling snake-eyes (except for of course the chance to roll again). There is no $100 reward for getting to zip across the board on a pair of sixes. And money that goes to the bank doesn't end up on a "Free Parking" pool. Finally, when you sell back houses, you only get 1/2 of the original value you paid for them. Houses aren't supposed to be some giant money laundering pyramid scheme.

And yet, most people I've talked to play with those and many other twisted rules (like not having to pay to get out of jail and being able to collect rent while in jail). Why?

The answer is pretty simple. By increasing the cash flow (i.e. handing out money every time little Johnny or little Jennifer happen to roll the dice) a more cunning and/or risk taking players have less an advantage. The point of the game is to take risks. If it wasn't, there wouldn't be dice involved. But the message of taking risks, and what could be a good lesson in the present worth of money is LOST when the game balance is messed up by putting more money on the board than the game designers originally intended.

The end result is, what should be a 1-2 hour game, can last sometimes as 6 hours when a group of children go at it. Oh, they still have fun ... but games are supposed to be fun and educational. Monopoly is really a well designed game. If the game designers wanted a single game to last over 2 hours, the "Beauty Contest" prize would be on the order of $100, instead of the original $11 (it was later changed to $10 so as to not confuse people ... I'm serious here).

From Jr. High to present, I've considered myself a gamer. I've played a few war games, but most of the games I play are strategy, optimization, or diplomacy games. There are good games, fun games, and some that are both. There also are bad games. Monopoly can be fun. And it certainly has stood the test of time.

I know, Monopoly has changed over the years. And though I'm complaining, I continue to play the game. But I would rather play the game in an environment where you don't get $100s every turn. To borrow from Worf from the Next Generation: "All those wild cards support a weak hand."

LISTENING TO: Android Lust the Dividing CD Demo

-=-

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