2003-03-18 - 4:38 p.m.

Boom! No boom today, but there always is a boom.

[+2 pts] to whoever can guess that quote. Here is a hint. There is one time in my life that I dreamt I was a woman. I dreamt I was this character. She rocks, well for a longhaired chick that is. **snicker**

Well, the Bay-Bridge was not destroyed last night. Though I did manage to fuck up my fourth favorite body part. It really sucks. In the past year, I broke my favorite body part. Just a little over a week ago I broke my second favorite body part. And for two plus months my fourth favorite body part has been aching.

When will I get a break?

But hell, things could be worse. I could live in Iraq.

Deathguild was packed. I figured it would be. I got a moderate amount of dancing time, but really that is about all I can handle right now. My medications aren't helping, so it is time to move rest and relaxation up a bit.

But no wonder my body has been breaking down in the past year. Look what has come of the world? While talking to Shells I told her that part of her own elevated stress levels could be related to this war footing. This is a big deal, and frankly it makes me sad.

So unbelievably sad that when my friends in San Francisco asked, "[Contour], why don't you go clubbing anymore?", that I replied honestly, "There are more important things in our lives now. The men in my family have always died in their 60s. It just is a genetic fact. And with the current economy and pending war, that I've been spending most of my free time with my family."

Things are changing faster now than ever before. While this can be exciting, it is stressing as well. I just don't know what to do. It is as if the answer is just right out of my reach ... it could be my old martyr complex shining through, but as my ex used to point out, I make a habit out of trying to save the world.

Some super villain I'd be. Heck, I can't even play the role of a sometimes super hero if I'm broken. Perhaps the best way I can prepare for tomorrow's boom would be to keep myself in top physical health. The sad thing is, I've been trying so hard to do just that, and even this is denied me.

LISTENING TO: Bel Canto's "Intravenous"

-=-

P.S. Right, I'm stuck on a single song. Find the song and you'll understand why.

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