2001-03-25 - 04:14 a.m.

Today my play group (BDSM / Poly related) had a party at what is one of our typical dungeons. Spring was going to be there, but I figured I would go with the knowledge that if it hurt too much I could leave.

I believe things went well. Nobody knew what transpired, though both her diary and my own had talked about our issues (admittedly from each of our perspectives). I only told two people about the break-up, and I am assuming that Wingtip knew already. I told BunnyStomp and Firebug. I really wanted to talk a bit more with BunnyStomp, but people kept walking in, but I rarely ever get private time to just talk to her.

Spring was super kind to me, made mixed drinks and brought them to me, tried to tickle me and stuff ... oh I think tonight was fine.

Now the good news was that while sitting near the DJ booth, one of my doms and another dom both decided they needed a boy to play with. So I had an inpromptu scene. They both are actually very good doms, I've learned so much from one of them ... she really knows her stuff. But both of them are also a slight bit sadistic. Fortunately they weren't tonight.

I stripped down naked, stood, kneeled, and lied down on a mat while they both used knives, a medicine wheel, a breathing collar, candles, ice, floggers, feathers, and naturally hands. One trick since I forgot to bring my restrains was to have me put my hands against the wall while holding quarters ... if I dropped the quarters they both promised massive punishments for me. The is how the game goes, and I am comfortable with it, because in my mind I know they both are friends and the point of the scene is for us all to have fun.

But it was so cold that my dick sriveled to such a small size I've never seen before. :( I didn't like that, but hey it happens.

At one point I had to hold a lit candle with my butt and then go from kneeling to lying down or lying down to standing without dropping it. That was so FUN! :)

I had nipple clamps on for the first time in my life too. My nipples are still sore, but it is a good sore. It feels as if somebody was playing with them directly in sex or something.

I am very comfortable getting naked in front of people for a scene. While I don't like making myself naked, somehow when a dom orders me to get naked, I know there is a purpose and it is so easy.

All too often people worry about BDSM, and others assume that it always are women that bottom. But these two doms top both womena and men. The one I've played with before actually shows no preference, or rather she picks her submissives based on her current needs (she actually is a switch). The other usually sticks to women, but lately as been topping/dominating femme guys. I'm one of the more femme guys apparently.

I really like the fact that everybody at the party tonight were open minded, and aren't stuck on the "woman must be the bottom" ideal. I hate gender prejudices so much.

In fact, people assume that men don't have the same (or at least similar) sexual problems. I'm talking about abuse. You often hear about women who were abused as children or adults, but not as often about men. It really does make it difficult to talk to men about this, because so many believe it just isn't something you talk about.

-=-

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